I simply adore little unexpected love notes, perfume in pretty bottles, soft and frilly garments (whether worn on the outside, or underneath. Hehe), sassy red shoes, flowers in every hue, sweet fluffy feather pillows with rosebud prints, glowing candlelight, and of course loads of sparkly jewelry! You would figure that I am hoping for cupid to bring me something along those lines, right? Well I'm not!!
You see, I have a confession to make. My one absolute guilty pleasure is my holey, threadbare, raggedy men's robe that I have had for a trillion years. I know, this a shocker right?? Not so romantic... I know!!
It seems that I have just painted a pretty picture, and then boom, I dropped a load of baby poo on it!!
Before you judge let me tell the various ways my beloved robe has served me:
- It has acted as a nice and comfy "smoking jacket". Not that I smoke, but I feel that the robe gives that Hugh Hefner look when I wear it around the house over my regular clothes. I even slipped that bad boy on over my wedding dress on my wedding night!!! Well, if Al didn't see that as a caution sign, then I guess he must have had his eyes shut TIGHT!!
- At night it serves as an extra blanket.
- It's even served as a emergency baby blanket. Though Al put an immediate stop to that one. He told me if I wanted to look like a hobo that was one thing, but not the kids. Not to mention that between the two of my munchkins, I have enough baby blankets to open up my own maternity ward!
Truly folks, the list could go on and on, but I have a feeling I would be the only one not bored.
Well, the time has come to bid the robe adieu. You see, the trim of the robe has become separated from the rest of the robe. This has proven to be a great hazard. Every time I walk past a door, the friggin trim gets caught on the doorknob!!! Not only tearing my lovey further, but yanking me backwards as well!!
So folks bow your heads with me and give a moment of silence for my beloved robe. I wish that cupid ( a.k.a Al ) would bring me another, but I know he is glad to see the thing go, and is not willing to endure another 12 years of unattractive robe wearing. I know that he will continue to buy me slinky, silky robes from Victoria's Secret, and that I will continue NOT to wear them.
Ahhhh, but what Mr. doesn't know is that I have a BACK-UP tucked away in the depths of my closet!!
Mu ha ha ha!!! |
Previous Valentine's Day Loot |
My Beloved Robe I know...can you believe I was wearing this? |
Check out the frayed sleeves! Can you believe this?? Frayed not!! Hahaha, get it?? |